You Can Be Anything You Want To Be
...And Other Half-Truths We Tell Children
A few days ago, while on an evening stroll, I came across a boy in a school uniform staring at the project board of a big construction site. It turned out to be a project I had worked on about 5 years ago. Having already passed the young chap, I felt the nudge to engage him.
After asking for his name, I inquired about his interest in the project board. Turns out he was fascinated by buildings and wanted to be a civil engineer.
I introduced myself as an architect and told him about the project and a few others I had worked on in the environment. His face lit up as the coincidence dawned on him.
His father worked as a security man in the building, so he spent his after-school hours stuck on the site until his father’s shift was over. I proceeded to encourage him that his dreams were valid and he could be anything he wanted to be if he put his mind to it and focused on his education. A few more kind words and I was off.
The Inner Conflict
As I walked away from that interaction, I felt a combination of pride and unease. Pride because I had offered a few words of encouragement to a young dreamer. Unease because I may have glossed over the realities of life with one statement.
I did not tell him that as a child, I wanted to be a recording and touring musician. I did not tell him that if I had my way, I would drop it all, pick up a guitar and go — I still might.
I did not tell him about the countless people who had to revise their childhood dreams to fit their current realities and newly found identities. I didn’t tell him that he could be multiple things simultaneously.
I gave the safest advice to give. A truth that feels so insufficient, it borders on a lie.
But what else can one say to a young dreamer? Will you tell them that it’s all worthless — that life just happens to many people? Of course not. On one hand, they cannot make sense of it, and on the other hand, that would only kill the dreamer in them, and we all need a dream to keep us going.
Indeed, there are a thousand things that could come up against a dreamer, especially in Nigeria: a backwards education system, JAMB, poor financial background. But none of those can truly stand against a dreamer.
The Resolution
Today, I stumbled on an Instagram page that gave a 10-year update on high schoolers. It was interesting to watch these adults reflect on what they thought they would be and compare it with who they currently are.
Only a few of them hit their childhood dream, but most of them seem fine and fulfilled in their realities.
No one can predict the impact of that singular conversation, but there’s only so much one can squeeze into a 5-minute chat between a young man and a young lad.
In the end, dreams may change — and that’s okay. What matters isn’t holding on to one idea forever, but learning to keep dreaming, no matter how life unfolds.
So, are you living your childhood dreams?
Are you who you always wanted to be?
What changed?
How does that make you feel?
Feel free to drop a comment.
The future isn’t certain and life can be messy, but the more I think about it, the more I still believe that this is the safest encouragement for young dreamers… if we care about keeping their hope alive.
Well—the safest encouragement if we don’t want to introduce the concept of “God’s plans” into the conversation.